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English essay : what grade?

Right this is the start of my Romeo and Juliet essay just wandering if anyone could give me any feedback and mainly help to get it up to an A ? posotive and negatives please :)here : Romeo and JulietRomeo and Juliet is an Elizabethan play which is set in Verona in Italy which involves the most important and timeless themes; love and conflict. These two themes are what have enabled it to still be read and performed as it excites the audience and allows their imagination to flow. Act one scene five is the most monumental scene within the play. This is when Romeo and Juliet meet for the very first time. During this scene the mood and atmosphere changes periodically from excitement to romance and violence this creates excitement for the audience and also gives them their own views on the scene.Just before in act one scene four, dramatic irony is portrayed to the audience through Romeo’soliquay. The use of soliquay is to show what Romeo’s thoughts are on the party before he is even there. At the beginning of act one scene five, there is an extremely busy atmosphere when the servants are having a discussion about the guests arriving at the Capulet’s ball when they say "You are being looked for, and called for and sought for in the great chamber" This helps set the mood of the party , making it more exciting for the audience. This is shown using the aforementioned quote as the servants are rushing around busily. This again creates excitement for the audience as they feel the busy atmosphere of the preparation for the party. This shows that the Capulet’s are very wealthy, having servants for example tis a foul thing" This shows the contrast between the servants and Capulet’s "welcome gentlemen" These two quotes distinguish the rich from the poor because it shows the difference of their diction and how they speak. As the ball begins Lord Capulet is portrayed as a nice, laid back gentlemen, when he is encouraging his guests to the dance. Shakespeare shows his humorous personality when Lord Capulet says "Ladies that have their toes unplauged with corns she I’ll swear hath corns" This is done to embarrass the guests and encourage them to dance. This excites the audience as it shows he is not like the other Capulet’s. For example, Tybalt is vigilant and does not have such a great sense of humour. Shakespeare’s words have been used to make the audience feel sad and wish that Romeo had asked for consent to marry Juliet as it would have prevented the horrific tragedy.In the next part of the scene it’s important to build up both tension and excitement with a romantic theme as this is when Romeo first catches sight of Juliet. At the time when Romeo "gate crashes" the party, the audience feel anxious as we know immediately that this is going to turn nasty as Romeo is not supposed to be there. The audience are intrigued as they don’t know what is going to happen next. When Romeo first lays eyes on Juliet he is absolutely flabbergasted by her beauty that he almost forgets his love for Rosaline.The excitement gradually starts to assemble as they know he has fallen deeply in love with Juliet. They know this because the first thing Romeo says when he see’s her is "so shows a snowy dove trooping with crows; as I yonder Lady o’er her shows" Shakespeare’s use of metaphor is effective because Romeo is insinuating that Juliet looks like a dove and everyone else there looks like a crow. The audience then believe that Juliet is as graceful as a dove, and all the women around her are like dirty, undesirable creature "crows", deduces the audience to think this. Also he Shakespeare writes "for I never saw true beauty till this night" This shows that Romeo that Romeo feels as if he has never truly loved anyone before. On the other hand this also creates a sense of danger for the audience as they can see that something terrible is going to erupt and ruin this love , as told by his prologue.When Tybalt hears Romeo’s voice and see’s that he has gate crashed the party he automatically believes that Romeo has done this deliberately to pour scon on him. Tybalt then tries to start a fight with Romeo. Despite the fact that Tybalt has changed the tone completely with his violence and anger , Lord Capulet decides to intervene to keep the peace and not spoil the party as he says "why how now kinsman , whereforestrom you so" Even though Tybalt then agrees to keep the peace he decides he will get revenge later. "I will withdraw but this intrusion shall" This leaves the audience at the edge of their seats as they know Romeo is in prodigious trouble.

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2 Responses so far.

  1. urechitin says:

    Its really good ! I’d probably give it an 85…. I live in Ireland though so we don’t do GCSE so what percentage is an A at GCSE level? Over here an A1 is 90-100% and an A2 is 85-90% !

  2. hatlessness says:

    It’s good but you don’t say if you’re looking for a grade A at GCSE or A lev? or what the mark scheme is?