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10 POINTSSS! FOR A GOOD ANSWER! I NEED HELP ON MY OBSERVATION ESSAY?





ok well Im a freshmen in college and my second essay is a observation essay. The professor said to go to a place (im going to go to the park) and observe the scene,place,people, she said little by little (engage the reader) she said start with details and color to it, people around, surroundings, sounds,smells,feelings (air,sun) Im having trouble making the intro a good one. Can you please help me on how to start this essay, on this about the park, she wants it to be complex, not just regular words.One example she gave was "i have grown up on cardinal baseball ever since i can remember..." that would be something for someone describing the scene of the saint louis bush stadium.. she also mentioned leave generalization alone, come up with better phrases for detailsim going to write about leaves coming down, people walking their dogs, smell of fresh air, kids playing baseball, just a good palce to relax, can anyone think of anything else.. and could you help me with starting the intro, thank youthanx alot



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7 Responses so far.

  1. MacKimm says:

    you’ve already got some good observations there.The brown, gold, and red leaves shower gently down on me as I walk beneath the stately old trees of ____________Park. Their pungent fragrance, mixed with the smell of grass, fills my senses with a rare perfume that transports me to another time, a time of my youth and memories come flooding back.Add on from there–you can do it!

  2. auditives says:

    As i took my first step to climb the ladder and then to gradually slide down with enjoyment….Is this ok? im in the 9th grade and just thought of it on the spot. i know im not that good with essays but glad if i helped.

  3. transmogrification says:

    have you ever been to a place that you can escape from all your worries just sit there relax and enjoy nature. I have my place where i can be lose and free frome all worries. a place where ive escaped from stress from as long as i can remember. The smell of fresh air and the breeze that flows through my hair , as i watch the unfamiliar faces walk by.

  4. clustery says:

    You have it in you. You have an opinion, ideas, feelings about a place and the people there. If you can, take a laptop with you to the park. As you sit, type or write out your thoughts and impressions as they come to you. There is no correct way to do this other than to trust yourself to perceive and feel things about where you are and then write down those thoughts and feelings. Take a timer with you and commit to continuing to write continuously about the park for 3 minutes at a time. Once you have a few pages of this you can take it home and shape it into a structured essay.

  5. internodium says:

    Maybe you can say something like.. I have lived in the city all my life (briefly describe negative aspects of the city, {like red brick walls, cement, asphalt, lack of greenery, no grass, trees or plants, to many people, rudeness} etc. ), one place I find that can take away the stresses of city life is the local park…

  6. amices says:

    talk about the wildlife like squirrels and birds. i went to the park today and saw ducks. talk about all the sounds and smells around you. use as many varied words as you can (get a thesaurus!) good luck.

  7. Leptostromataceae says:

    How did you first feel when you saw the park? Were you disappointed because of its size? What did you notice the first time you came? What caught your attention? You could start with that.